Get ready for couples advice
The decision to go to couples counseling is a big problem.
You have chosen to invest in your relationship, and you are
committed to improving it for you. You say "this is worth fighting
for," which is commendable.
Couples counseling is a great environment where you can get
to know each other and take steps to solve any problems you encounter. But
while counseling is a wonderful environment in which you are experiencing
unprecedented growth, you need to make sure that you and your partner are
prepared for this.
After working with couples from all backgrounds and walks of
life, we found that the best results come when couples are prepared. To help
you prepare for counseling for couples, we created this resource to help you
prepare.
Think about what is actually needed to work
Although you may have decided to consult because of some
stressful issues, it's worth some time to think about your long happiness. You
want to know what kind of life you want to build or restore with your partner.
Consider your individual shortcomings (this can be difficult - most of us find
it difficult to recognize the problems that we may have) and be willing to
discuss these publicly in your counseling session.
Write anything suitable for discussion at your session
You may experience a lot of conflict with your partner right
now, and this can be difficult. While you may have developed patterns to deal
with it, such as fighting or hiding from it, try to write down how you feel and
what triggered the conflict and what you did about it. This type of logs can be
very useful for the processor.
Think about what you love from your partner and what hurts you the most
Again, this may include writing some basic things, but it's
important to decide what you like or love with your partner and find what you
want to save and restore. Also, if your partner is engaged in activities or
behavior that hurt you, record it.
The reason for this is that during a treatment session with
your couples counselor, there will be a lot going on. You may find it difficult
to remember some details. But if you have things written, you'll find it much
easier to keep them in mind and discuss them.
Get introspection
Much of the useful work before a counseling session for
couples involves introspection. When you are introspective, you are dealing
with your thoughts on key issues and choosing what to focus on. Try to shift
your perspective to see things from the perspective of partners before the
session.
This can give you a good idea of why they feel the way
they feel. You may also want to try an exercise like mindfulness. Mindfulness
gives you concentration and space to be as present as possible. It can be a
very useful tool not only to prepare you before treatment but in other parts of
your life.
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Think about couples advice? Contact us today
Couples counseling is a very effective tool used by couples
around the world to achieve the kind of results they cannot get alone.
At CFHP, we work with all types of couples, including
heterosexual couples, homosexual couples, long-term de facto couples, married
couples, and parents with young families. We have helped couples to work
through a variety of conflict and personal issues, including issues of trust,
infidelity, childhood trauma, and anger.
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